One of the things I forget from time to time is that the lesbian community here is small. The girl at work knew the ex-girlfriend of Heather's ex-girlfriend, and that lady delivers food to where we work. Mamie is part of the lesbian couple who had a baby, and her partner Whitney knows the girl at work.
Some of that is charming, but some of that is overwhelming. Both Heather and I are homebodies-- we eat sushi, we watch a lot of trashy reality TV, and we talk a lot more about work than we should-- and we don't network or see that many people outside work, her small group of friends, and my parents (the ones who don't know about Baby). The gay community is not our community. We don't really have one.
Except now we're in the gay community without asking for it. It's like we've spoken the magic words, but instead of the Goblin King arriving to steal the baby away from us, the lesbians have arrived to bring one. What have we gotten ourselves into? "We want a baby" fell from our lips, and then "We need some advice" followed, with a stream of nosy people right behind it.
Did I mention that we have one friend who works at the women's clinic here? And that when we went there to meet with Nina, another friend turned out to work in the offices, too?
But it isn't just the lesbians. We're in an early stage, and there's going to be more interference with every step. Opinions about sperm donors and ICU versus ICI. Advice about names and birthing, strangers rubbing Heather's swollen belly, and people in grocery stores smiling at the toddler in the cart. Babies are public, aren't they? We've sold ourselves into community slavery with those words of yearning and hope, and we cannot walk away.