Sunday, July 31, 2011

Fighting boredom and each other

Heather is on day 9 today, and we'd normally be revving up to inseminate, but she's about to go on a trip to see her family in the Northwest and is stressed enough, so we're going to skip this round.  Fair enough.

After the seventh negative, we decided it might be time to look for some more medical feedback.  It's probably too soon to freak out-- seven tries is perfectly normal-- but Heather took this one very hard, and I, for the first time in a long time, was surprised and hurt.  I thought this one was it. 

The last time Heather got upset, she looked up information on IVF clinics in the area and we contemplated making an appointment.  The first clinic didn't respond to our e-mail about treating single women (it seemed like a stretch to ask about lesbians) and we let it go after agreeing to give ICI another shot before jumping into infertility treatments.  This time the deal is that we're going to get some testing done by different doctors with different equipment.  Hopefully we'll learn more than whether H has a uterus.

Mamie & Whitney had an ob-gyn they loved, so I called to make an appointment with her.  September 20th is the earliest she can see us.  Made the appointment anyhow, figuring we'd want a good ob-gyn later in the game, and the more information the better in the meanwhile.  Per my physician's recommendation, I made an appointment with another lady who can see us this Tuesday. 

I don't know what any of these people can do.  I can't help envisioning we go there and they say, "Oh, go see this specialized office three hours away for the dye test."  But we've spent a year and a half working with Nurse Nina and getting iffy test results, and any information with legit machinery would be nice.

The bitch of it is getting all our medical records from Nurse Nina's office, which turns out to require their office to fax an authorization form to us, and for us to fax it back...  Then the fax machine didn't work and the medical records lady at the clinic left for the day...  In the meanwhile, I'm trying to write up a summary of our efforts and cross-reference it with the blog which, pathetically, is a much more thorough record than our chart. 

And then it's one more thing for Heather to deal with before going on this trip.  Discussing these arrangements with Heather was not great.  She feels I'm rushing her with one appointment after another, one obligation after another, and I feel like everything we do is some form of waiting.  The only time of action is insemination and everything else is sitting around.  We've got to skip a cycle while Heather's on her trip, then maybe another one depending on the doctor's testing recommendations (Nurse Nina made us skip two while she tested), and it feels as though getting pregnant is further away all the time.  So, yes, I'm rushing.  I want to see people and get answers so we can inseminate with confidence or go on to something else.  I promised to buy Heather a latte at Starbucks after Tuesday's appointment.

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