Today marks the official end of our vacation free-for-all, and I am drinking water.
There's never a good time to give up caffeine and junk food, so I put it
off until after our trip. After all, you can hardly concentrate on
lean proteins and broccoli when surrounded by prosciutto, red wine, and
pasta. And you can order all the courses you want on a cruise ship, so
why not get dessert at every meal? The trick, of course, to making
those deals with yourself--"The diet starts Monday"-- is that eventually Monday comes, or the trip ends, and you have to face the ugly part of the arrangement. In this case, water.
I did make a lukewarm effort to join Heather in a healthy pre-pregnancy program, back in the day, but she didn't pressure me to give up Diet
Mountain Dew, and my own self-restraint faded quickly. I've got to do
the Dew, you know? This time, the self-restraint is not for the sake of
household morale, and I have to remind myself that this
caffeine-craving body is the same one that will hopefully support new
life in the future. What if giving up soda and French fries makes my
body just a little more conception-friendly? What if that little bit of
an edge is the difference between three inseminations and five? So
pineapple it is.
I have to go back to my psychiatrist and discuss the future of my
mental health where it intersects with the future of my reproductive
health, since our effort at cutting back on my meds came had troublesome
results. After a couple weeks, I had to call her nurse to admit that I
was too irritable to handle even the day-to-day frustrations of work.
So now we're back where we started and I'm not sure how it'll play out.
When I'm depressed and cranky, I self-soothe with junk food; you're
telling me I have to cut back on anti-depressants and junk food? That
seems untenable. No one relaxes with water and pineapple.
Reader, I exercised. I drank water all day, ate a healthy lunch, then came home, did laundry, and spent 10 minutes on the elliptical. I'm the best person ever, as far as Day 1 goes. We'll see about tomorrow.